I married Thomas when I was 19.
We were kids with nothing but a small apartment, some wobbly secondhand chairs, and dreams that far outpaced our checking account.
We built our life one brick at a time: buying a house, saving for retirement, and following all the other boring but necessary steps to build a solid, stable life.
I prided myself on having an honest marriage.
I was a fool.
I prided myself on having an honest marriage.
Thirty-nine years later, I stood in the rain and watched them lower Thomas into the dirt.
“A heart attack,” the doctors said. They told me it was quick.
“At least he didn’t suffer,” they whispered at the wake.
I just nodded. People say that like it provides some kind of cushion for the fall, but it doesn’t.
Grief is a quiet thing after four decades. It doesn’t scream. It just reminds you that the space across the table is now a permanent vacancy.
Thomas wasn’t a man of secrets. At least, that was the story I told myself for half my life.
I stood in the rain and watched them lower Thomas into the dirt.
